Why to fly business
“On behalf of Intra Air airlines, I would like to welcome all of you aboard our flight from New York to Madrid. For those of you traveling coach please be advised that two of the lavatories at the back of the plane are in service. The rest of the toilet facilities are reserved for our business class passengers. We hope you enjoy your flight and thank you for flying Intra Air.”
“Passengers, this is your captain speaking. We seem to be having some trouble with one of our four engines, but not to worry, this super sophisticated Boeing aircraft can fly safely on three engines. I am pleased to announce that the business cabin crew will now serve complementary champagne and in about an hour we will get around to handing out tasteless warm orange juice cartons to those of you flying coach. We hope you enjoy the remainder of your flight and thank you again for flying Intra Air.”
“Attention all passengers, it seems I was over optimistic the last time I talked to you. Two more of our engines have burned out, but we have it on good authority that we can still make it with our remaining one. Meanwhile our smiling stewardesses will hand out caviar cocktails to our business flyers and extra sick bags to those in coach. We will do our best to make the remainder of your flight comfortable and thank you for flying Intra Air”
“Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. It is my sad duty to inform you that the fourth and final engine has gone kapput. I’ve been talking to the people at Boeng but they have informed me that even their planes are unable to fly without an engine. We will be making an emergency landing n the Atlantic Ocean, an estimated 10 miles off the shore of Spain. The ground temperature is 28 degrees Centigrade and sunny. For those traveling business please remove the inflatable life suits from beneath your seats. For those traveling coach, thank you again for flying Intra Air.”
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