Minuet: the future Twitter worth at least $1 billion
I'm the sort of guy who has all these great ideas but am unable to do anything with them, which is the reason my apartment is not next to Bill Gates mansion (or Hugh Hefner's for that matter). Some clever kids came up with Facebook , Twitter and Youtube and now take their baths in French champagne on their private 767 jet. Well I have this great idea which I will reveal in a minute, and if someone out there d...
ChatRoulette: what you've been missing
© 2010 Steve Taite. All rights reserved. If you enjoyed this post please leave a comment and pass on to your friends. If not feel free to pass on to your enemies. Don't want to miss a post? What are you waiting for, subscribe now or follow me on twitter.
You know you're really pregnant when
...that creepy guy on the train who is unable to extract the finger from his nostril and who wears a torn pair of black bell bottom jeans, gets up to give you a seat. ...the guy at the local convenience store starts wrapping pickles for you before you even get to the counter. ...your homeroom teacher suggests that you both have a little ...
How to Get Rich Without Really Trying
You want to get rich fast. There's only one big problem. Your skint! Your bank balance is in the red, your bank manager refuses to return your calls, your family have disowned you and the national sweepstakes refuses to chose your lucky numbers. All is lost. Not quite my friend. There are still opportunities out there to make money from thin air - literally. Here is a list of some possible options and because I'm...
Commercials from the Real World
Having hard day? Your boss doesn't understand you? Your bank account overdrawn? Your bank manager doesn't understand you? We have just the escape for you. For a limited time only join us on a Homeless Weekend. No necessity to pack any fancy clothes, come as you are and experience a life with no commitments. And just to prove to you how serious we are we'll throw in 3 complementary meals at the Downtown Ki...
Cruise vacations: 10 things they never told you about
1. The pictures of the young girls in the slim bikinis were taken 30 years ago. You get the updated version. 2. The round the clock, all you can eat buffets aren't half as appealing when you've spent your day throwing up over the port side of the ship. 3. If you want to avail yourself of one of the ten available treadmills you must sign up on the first day and with a bit of luck you'll get your 15 minutes...
Cruise vacations: 10 things they never told you about
1. The pictures of the young girls in the slim bikinis were taken 30 years ago. You get the updated version. 2. The round the clock, all you can eat buffets aren't half as appealing when you've spent your day throwing up over the port side of the ship. 3. If you want to avail yourself of one of the ten available treadmills you must sign up on the first day and with a bit of luck you'll get your 15 minutes...
When NOT to Answer your Mobile Phone
Mobile phones have taken over our lives. They are cute, they are musical and they fit easily into the front pocket of your pants or that miniature leather handbag that you carry everywhere. Even so, sometimes it is downright stupid, impolite or dangerous to answer your ring-tone. In an attempt to promote world safety and invest some simple manners into you, here are my guidelines for when not to take that c...
The lighter side of death
Visiting Rites Susan Jane McCoy was a righteous and graceful eighty five year old lady who was spending the last of her days at the St Mary Retirement home in southern New Jersey. One fine morning she requested to speak to the local priest. "Father", she said in a broken, worn out voice "I feel that my time is drawing near and I have two requests." "Mrs. McCoy, you have been a faithful member of our c...
The Taite Guide to Prisons for the Rich and Famous
Some Inmates have all the luck! "Gentlemen, I am warden Walter W. Felon III and I would like to welcome you all to the Beverly Hills Confinement Facility for the Rich and Famous. We don't like to think of it as a prison, more a home away from home with bars. We hope that your stay with us will be a happy and fulfilling one and promise to make every effort to meet your demands. To help do this I h...
The Internet Academy: An On-Line Syllabus for the Geeks of Tomorrow
Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiakitnatahu is a real place. It is the name of an existing hill in New Zealand, or so the Internet claims.This comes from the same people who tell me that goldfish have a memory span of three seconds (how anyone measured that I don't know), and giraffes can't sing. The Internet is the basis for all our knowledge now. We have no choice but to believe...
11 Things you shouldn't do at a wedding
1. Get blind drunk and hang your panties on the chandelier while performing your version of "Yes I Cancan" 2. Have sex with the best man in the bathroom during the wedding ceremony. 3. Though you are the best man, have sex n the bathroom with the maid of honour and lose the wediing ring down the toilet in a moment of unexplained animal passion. 4. Have sex with the best man and the maid of honour in the ...
Cruise vacations: 10 things they never told you about
1. The pictures of the young girls in the slim bikinis were taken 30 years ago. You get the updated version. 2. The round the clock, all you can eat buffets aren't half as appealing when you've spent your day throwing up over the port side of the ship. 3. If you want to avail yourself of one of the ten available treadmills you must sign up on the first day and with a bit of luck you'll get your 15 minutes...
The Taite Guide to Apple
Now that Steve Jobs has displayed the Ipad to the world, it remains to be seen which new devices he will conquer the world with in the years to come. Here, from our personal inside mole at a top secret Apple research lab, is a guide to a few of the new products Apple is secretly working on. 1. The Ipotty. Press for number one or number two as applicable 2. The Imobile. Tomorrows breakthrough in mobile...
50 Things You Shouldn't Try Doing
Taking a shower while boiling a hard boiled egg. Wearing socks with holes in them while visiting a mosque. Eating sushi with a knife and fork in a Tokyo restaurant. Eating M&Ms with a knife and fork if you're not appearing on a sitcom. Posting a nude photograph of your ex-boss on Facebook - people have gone missing presumed dead for less. Bungee jumping over the George Washington Bridge while 7...

Soundtrack of My Life

Two recent albums made me reassess my relationship with music. As a part-time musician and composer (mostly lyrics), I used to believe that I made music, but after the reassessment I began to realise that music made me. Both albums were rerecordings of pop classics, Love by the Beatles made me look at the songs that I’ve known by heart for decades in a new light, Live in London by Leonard Cohen showed me that old singers can improve on their glorious past by returning a new, fresh, adult rendition of their songs. Music has been a part of my life ever since I went to see a very young Cliff Richard romancing young Lauri Peters on a double decker red bus in Summer Holiday. But it wasn’t until I heard four Liverpudlians singing She Loves You in a music store that my soundtrack really started. The Soundtrack of My Life doesn’t necessary include the best of the music I listen to (notably Pink Floyd is missing here.) it is basically a list of the music that has accompanied me on my life’s journey so far, and is still firmly there in the background. Please tell me which music you have on your life’s soundtrack, it should make for interesting reading .

Help! The Beatles 1965 As I slowly drifted from kid to teenager and discovered the attraction of the opposite sex , Help! was truly what I needed.
Grooving The Young Rascals 1967 There was no way that you could feel down after hearing this song on a sunny Sunday afternoon.
Help Deep Purple 1968 Purple had yet to invent heavy rock and their haunting version of this Beatles song was a masterpiece in itself.
Season of the Witch/ Al Kooper & Steven Stills 1968 This is what happens when great artists let it loose and jam for nine hours in a rented studio.
Suzanne/ Leonard Cohen 1969 – A young poet with a guitar and stunning lyrics persuaded me that I too should write lyrics and poetry.
Who knows where the time goes?/Farport Convention 1969 Sandy Denny wrote this masterpiece for Fairport. A truly great song.
You Can’t Always Get What You Want/ Rolling Stones 1969 Behind the Stones’ loud mouthed rock hid some interesting philosophy. There comes a time when you stop being a wild, reactionary idealist and transform into a realist.
Fire and Rain/ James Taylor The death of a friend resulted in one of the best pop songs ever written.
Your Song/Elton John 1970 Do I need to say more? Is there truly a more romantic song out there?
Where Do the Children Play?/ Cat Stevens 1970 Cat Stevens created music that mattered and didn’t consist purely of a set of silly love songs.
Behind Blue Eyes/ The Who 1971 From the Who’s best album comes a song that tries to delve into the human conscience. Read the lyrics, they may surprise you.
Blue/Joni Mitchel 1971 Deep poetry and folk music finally meet and art is born.
Aqualung / Jethro Tull 1971 Anderson’s real life visual of a homeless man is packaged together with Cross-eyed Mary and a heavily critical look at religion.
(Sometimes I feel so) Uninspired/Traffic 1973 A great optimistic song from Traffic that has been mostly overlooked over the years.
Tangled up in Blue/Dylan 1975 Dylan has written enough great songs to fill several life soundtracks. Why this song means so much to me is a mystery but I suppose that s part of its magic. Like many other Dylan pieces it has a great riff and no chorus.
Hotel California/The Eagles 1976 One of those songs that follows you around forever.
Romeo and Juliet - Dire Straits /1980 The sort of song that makes you feel good the moment you hear it.
Theme to Twin Peaks/Angelo Badalamenti 1990 Lock your doors, close the curtains, turn off all the lights and light the fire. Then listen to the haunting melody.
Run Baby Run/ Sheryl Crow 1995 Everyone can relate to something in this song. Maybe music didn’t die at the end of the seventies after all.
Taking The Long Way Around/Dixie Chicks 2006. “I met the queen of whatever /Drank with the Irish and smoked with the hippies / Moved with the shakers /Wouldn’t kiss all the asses that they told me to” - you have to love them.
Hometown Glory 2008. – “The people I’ve met are the wonders of my world”, and that from a 19 year old.
Jai Ho/ Slumdog Millionare Soundtrack 2008 I don’t understand a word but still it gives me a pick me up. What more can you expect from a song?

My Youtube Soundtrack of My Life Playlist

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© 2010 Steve Taite. All rights reserved.
If you  enjoyed this post please leave a comment and pass on to your friends. If  not feel free to pass on to your enemies.
Don't want to miss a post? What are you waiting for, subscribe now or follow me on twitter.