Mobile phones have taken over our lives. They are cute, they are musical and they fit easily into the front pocket of your pants or that miniature leather handbag that you carry everywhere.

Even so, sometimes it is downright stupid, impolite  or dangerous to answer your ring-tone. In an attempt to promote world safety and invest some simple manners into you, here are my guidelines  for when not to take that call.

1. At a funeral, unless you are the one being buried (don’t laugh it has happened – read more here)

2. In the bathroom. It doesn’t matter if you are English or American – whether you are n the loo or in the tub – the phone can wait. There is nothing more disgusting than speaking to someone and then hearing the sounds of him flushing n the background, and no, it’s not considered kinky.

3. If you are a wrestler in the middle of a half Nelson.

4. During a bank robbery. Whether you are the robber or the hostage, this is not the time to explain to your wife why you’ll be late for dinner.

5. In the Hasidic  Quarter of Brooklyn on a Saturday morning surrounded by Men in Black.

6. In a distant cave in Afghanistan, during an exclusive interview with Ben Laden. You might want to change your We are the Champions ring-tone too.

7. During your wedding vows. I know you want to share the news with all your high-school friends who swore you would never, ever marry, but now is not the time!

8. On the safari trip to Kenya that your wife talked you into, after falling off the back of the jeep just as it passes a group of hungry lions.

10. Just when the Queen gets to the point when she says “Arise Sir Taite”

Please add your own ideas.

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