Tommy Cooper may not have been the most likable person of stage, he was infamous for his bad drinking habits and pathological meanness, but onstage he was as unique as they come and a legend in his owntime. Whether he was a comic pretending to be a magician or vice versa is still debatable and for you to judge. Here are some examples of what made him a great comedian,if not a great magician.
   When he was eight years old his aunt bought him a magic set with which spent hours playing with it and perfecting the tricks. At the age of sixteen he gave his first public performance which went disastrously wrong. He was supposed to pull a series of coloured handkerchiefs from a cylinder, but they got stuck, a card fell out of his sleeve, Tommy ran out of the room, tears running down his face. When he finally managed to calm down he began to analyse just why he’d messed it up. “I got stage fright.” He would recall years later. “That’s why it all went wrong. But then I thought to myself, well, it might have all gone wrong but I got a laugh. Perhaps I should concentrate on that.” Thus one of the world’s best comedians and worst magicians was born.

 

Some of his famous quotes (courtesy of The Sun)
Two blondes walk into a building….you’d think at least one of them would have seen it.
I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn’t reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, “No, the steaks are too high”.
 
I went to a seafood disco last week…and pulled a muscle.
Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says “I’ll give you some cream to put on it.”
‘Doc I can’t stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home’
“That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. ‘Is it common?’ “It’s not unusual.”
A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. “My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?”
“Well,” said the vet, “let’s have a look at him”
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, “I’m going to have to put him down.”
“What? Because he’s cross-eyed?”
“No, because he’s really heavy”.

“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, ‘Parking Fine.’ So that was nice.”
Two aerials meet on a roof – fall in love – get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant.
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said ‘You’ve been promoted’ and I swerved.
And then he rang up a second time and said “You’ve been promoted again’ and I swerved again.
He rang up a third time and said ‘You’re managing director now’ and I went into a tree.
And a policeman came up and said ‘What happened to you?’ I said ‘I careered off the road”.
Two cannibals eating a clown. One says to the other “Does this taste funny to you?”
A woman told her doctor, ‘I’ve got a bad back.’ The doctor said, ‘It’s old age.’ The woman said, ‘I want a second opinion. ‘The doctor says, ‘OK, you’re ugly as well.’
‘I went to the doctors the other day and I said, ‘have you got anything for wind,’ so he gave me a kite.’

 

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