1. Get blind drunk and hang your panties on the chandelier while performing your version of  "Yes I Cancan" 2. Have sex with the best man in the bathroom during the wedding ceremony. 3. Though you are the best man, have sex n the bathroom with the maid of honour and lose the wediing ring down the toilet in a moment of unexplained animal passion. 4. Have sex with the best man and the maid of honour in the ...

      Having hard day? Your boss doesn't understand you? Your bank account overdrawn? Your bank manager doesn't understand you? We have just the escape for you. For a limited time only join us on a Homeless Weekend. No necessity to pack any fancy clothes, come as you are and experience a life with no commitments. And just to prove to you how serious we are we'll throw in 3 complementary meals at the Downtown Ki...

O.K. so I know when I've got a good thing going. You loved my earlier blog 100 things to when you're bored. Here are 40 more ideas 1. Paint your monitor black. 2. Paint your monitor screen black. 3. Try to get the paint of your screen before your boss sees it and fires you. 4. Write a musical about four legged animals who sing songs based on a long dead poet. - Oh that one's been done. Sorry, there are...

"All work and no play" well I think it's time to put a n end to all that. Here are ten ways to do it: After a holiday or office party  someone  automatically brings a double dose of espresso to your desk and no sly remarks about a possible hangover are allowed. - If your boss pisses you off twice in one week you are granted an immediate, paid one day vacation - Coffee served at work must not taste like ...

You want to get rich fast. There's only one big problem. Your skint! Your bank balance is in the red, your bank manager refuses to return your calls, your family have disowned you and the national sweepstakes refuses to chose your lucky numbers. All is lost. Not quite my friend. There are still opportunities out there to make money from thin air - literally. Here is a list of some possible options and because I'm...

It all started with a nightmare brought on by an overdose of chocolate, beer and late night horror movies. The dream started off normally enough. Getting up, eating breakfast, commuting to work. Then I noticed something peculiar. Something about my co-workers didn't seem kosher. Was it the fact that the doorman's skin was a bright  green, or that our secretary was finding it difficult to hide her middle leg. Only a ...

Has the person sitting next to you at work yet to discover the word deodorant? Does your co-worker sing Abba songs aloud eight hours a day? Does your co-worker pick his nose, thinking no one is watching, our excavate his ears? Does your co-worker were micro mini-skirts even though she weighs over 90 kg and is almost 62? Does the guy sitting opposite you tap on his desk with an HB pencil, mistaking...

We arrived at the airport three hours before departure time. My wife wasn't very happy about that fact but our previous holiday was all but ruined by the fact that the plane took off without us. This was the only time I can remember when my flight actually left when they said it would. We were late due to a traffic jam resulting from the collision between a truck full of boxes of adult Pampers and a semi-trailer...

You want to get rich fast. There's only one big problem. Your skint! Your bank balance is in the red, your bank manager refuses to return your calls, your family have disowned you and the national sweepstakes refuses to chose your lucky numbers. All is lost. Not quite my friend. There are still opportunities out there to make money from thin air - literally. Here is a list of some possible options and because I'm...

A foreigner's first experience with a Japanese toilet could easily be compared with a teenagers first experience with love. You meet this gorgeous girl during the school recess but you have no idea what to do about it. No-one has given you an instructions manual. The same can be said about Japanese washlets - right  you really don't want to call it a toilet any more than you'd call a Jaguar E-Type Roaster a car - t...

      Having hard day? Your boss doesn't understand you? Your bank account overdrawn? Your bank manager doesn't understand you? We have just the escape for you. For a limited time only join us on a Homeless Weekend. No necessity to pack any fancy clothes, come as you are and experience a life with no commitments. And just to prove to you how serious we are we'll throw in 3 complementary meals at the Downtown Ki...

Project Management Life as a project manager is comparable to a mountain climber's. The big difference being that when you get to the peak you find there is no safe way down. Whenever  I get really down, my wife reminds me that it takes one women nine months to have a baby and no matter how you try it is impossible to perform the same feat in one month by impregnating nine women. It was a beautiful ...

Jan Janson was an expert at everything. He could read computer dumps in his sleep (and often did), produced perfect code, was always ahead of his deadline and magically produced wonderful cafe latte from the office coffee machine. He was popular with the girls, admired by the men and a perfect candidate for management. That was before he decided to get fired and  leave for a better position with the competition. It ...

Name: the Almighty Location: here, there and everywhere Web: www.thoushallnotkill.com Followers: tens of millions - I'm the almighty not one not Demi's live-in playmate! Following: Oprah - much more productive than Maria Noah_273 - OK so he's got a few bolts loose and his pigtail is really not in, but what the hell - he makes me smile. Maybe I'll give him a flood of his own. Then he'll have something...

Now that Steve Jobs has displayed the Ipad to the world, it remains to be seen which new devices he will conquer the world with in the years to come. Here, from our personal inside mole at a top secret Apple research lab, is a guide to a few of the new products Apple is secretly working on. 1. The Ipotty. Press for number one or number two as applicable 2. The Imobile. Tomorrows breakthrough in mobile...